A Room with a View...BANNED?

Here it is, a scene from my favorite movie from my high school senior year. I think that this is the film that got me hooked on all those period romance films where love is what it should be, and never is in real life. This is A Room with a View, but there have been others, I can remember my mother watching films like this when I was just a little girl. She used to watch Little Women, Rebecca, Pride and Prejudice, Tess, there are too many to mention.

These films not only bring back memories of time spent with my mom, they also seemed at the time to be what love and romance would be like when I grew up.

I have always struggled with whether we women should let our girls watch these romances. It is a double edged sword; While watching them one has a feeling of exhilaration at the thought of such a life's love, and at the same time, we as adults know that the relationship is not realistic. Little girls, on the other hand, don't have the experience to know that this kind of happiness just doesn't happen in real life as it does in these films; thus leaving us disappointed as grown women when our love interest falls short of Mr. Darcy in Price and Prejudice.

We women also have to ask ourselves if watching these romances sets our lovers up for certain failure. My experience has been that men seldom enjoy watching these chick flicks (unless they are gay) so therefore, how would they even know what we are expecting from romance, in essence, they are the ones who have been "set up"!!!!

So Chicks, what do you think, should our little girls be watching these romantic interludes or should they have to wait until they have some real life points of reference so that they understand that what they watch and what they feel in real life romance may be entirely different experiences??? Let's hear from you.

Looking at my Friend...Looking in the Mirror

Recently I had lunch with a good friend to whom I had confided some of my secrets and life's challenges, only to see the same sadness and pain staring back at me across the table from her eyes. It troubled me to see her this way as I know all too well what that feels like. When I looked at her I saw myself and realized that the decisions I am making are right for me.

I think back to the women we were years ago, and I am mourning the loss of laughter, carefree thoughts and lust for life's promises to come. The hope and the fun and the excitement of moving from girls to women brought with it it's own set of challenges...but still there was anticipation for what we would make of our lives ahead.

Now it is not as simple, we have made our way, chosen our life's path and are now at a crossroads. I have chosen to start over, although that is easier said than done, it is a decision whose time has come. This is not to say that a decision like this is right for all, I may even grow to regret this choice. But, sadness is a state that I can not remain in, it has taken over everything that made me who I am. I am hoping to come out of this with some remnant of who I used to be...we will see about that as only time will tell.

As for my friend, I wish for her the same thing I wish for myself; peace and happiness with whatever direction her life takes, but most of all I hope for the lust for life to return to her eyes and for the tears and sadness to subside. Love you K and I hope we will be friends forever!